


Bounty The Quicker Picker Upper

by Wyndewalker



Category: The Magnificent Seven (TV)
Genre: Gen, Magnificent Seven AU: ATF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-16
Updated: 2013-06-16
Packaged: 2017-12-15 04:34:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/845369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wyndewalker/pseuds/Wyndewalker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Things never go quite the way they're supposed to during a bust. Think JD, Vin, Ezra, gunshot wounds, and Bounty paper towels.  Yes, I know I'm insane.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bounty The Quicker Picker Upper

**Prologue**

"Alright. Ezra's called in with a meeting time for next week. Buck, Josiah, and Nathan are our buyers. Vin, I want you in the building here with that sniper rifle of yours. JD, you'll be with Vin. I want someone covering his back."

"But..."

"But what, Buck?" Chris turned his hard green gaze on him, cocking an eyebrow in question. "You have a problem with the assignments?"

"I thought he was going to be on surveillance?"

"Team 3 has that covered. I'll be in the van half the time coordinating with them and Team 5. If you think JD can't handle this..."

"No, no. He can handle it just fine," Buck hastened to say when his roommate turned pleading eyes in his direction. It wasn't that he didn't think the kid couldn't handle it, he just didn't like not being there to cover JD's back.

"Good. You all know what to do, so get to it."

**The Next Week**

JD fidgeted nervously, resisting the urge to check his ammo again, as he stood by the door of the small room Vin had picked. At the moment Vin was quickly and efficiently locking into place the pieces of his rifle. He glanced at JD as he slid the scope into place.

"Keep playing with your gun like that and you're gonna shoot yourself in the foot." Vin grinned when JD jumped in surprise, nearly dropping the aforementioned gun.

"Don't do that, Vin. You nearly gave me a heart attack."

"There's no need to be getting yourself all worked up. I doubt they'll even think to sweep the surrounding area, much less search each room. From what Ez was telling me, these guys make dirt look smart."

JD smiled at that. "Yeah, I did get the feeling Ezra wasn't real impressed by these guys. But they have managed to stay in business this long."

"So keep an eye out, but you don't need your gun out." A brief crackle of static came through his earpiece, making Vin sidle up to the only window in the room so he could look out. Two cars pulled into view, parking near the car and van Buck, Josiah, and Nathan were using. "Heads up, JD. The bad guys just arrived."

A few minutes passed as their mark, Ezra, Buck and Josiah chitchatted, sizing each other up. Vin just waited patiently, keeping the guy in his crosshairs. Unable to stay still any longer JD headed to the hallway door.

"Where you going, JD?"

"I figured I'd do a quick sweep. See if anyone was around."

"Stay on this floor and try not to make too much noise." Seeing him nod, Vin turned his gaze back to the meet. 

They both knew with Team 3 covering surveillance and half their team undercover, Chris wanted someone to keep an eye on JD. The only thing that made it bearable for him was that Vin treated him as an equal and fully expected him to watch his back, even if it was unlikely anyone would stumble across them in the deserted building.

JD was halfway down the hall when he heard footsteps on the stairs ahead of him. Shit. So much for being dumber than dirt, he thought, ducking into the closest room. Praying it was just Chris coming to check up on them for some reason, he waited silently, both guns drawn and ready. What seemed like an eternity later he heard the footsteps pause outside his room, then whomever it was started to enter. When the barrel of a definitely non-police issue gun was visible, JD knew he was in trouble. The gun was followed by a gorilla of a man in a hideous salmon colored shark skin suit.

It's no wonder Ezra found these guys so offensive. JD grinned to himself.

Once the guy was fully in the room JD stepped up behind him. He tapped him on the back as he said, "Something I can help you with, mister?"

Gorilla Guy swung around to find a kid who looked no more than 16 or 17 with longish black hair held back from his face with a newspaper boy cap on backwards, wearing a black t-shirt and ripped blue jeans, aiming two dangerous looking magnums at his chest.

"Who the hell are you?"

"Uh-uh, I asked you first. Whatcha doing up here?"

"Heard noises so I came to investigate."

"Right. You being a concerned citizen and all. I don't suppose you were up here trying to get the drop on my bosses down there, now were you?"

"Bosses? You work for them fellas?"

"Yep. Now why don't you put down that gun and slide it on over to me?" JD gave him his best imitation of Chris's cold-as-ice glare. The one he'd practiced for hours in the mirror.

Gorilla Guy considered it for a moment before starting to lower his gun as he kneeled. JD followed him with his guns and was glad he had when Gorilla guy kneeled and brought his own back up firing.

Everyone below instinctively ducked down at the sound of shots being fired. The men who'd been opening the crates stopped and looked to their boss. Buck, Ezra, Josiah, and Nathan glanced at each other before looking to the mark.

"You want to tell me what the hell that was?" Buck demanded after a moment of tense silence.

"Funny, I was just going to ask you that. You hiding someone up there?"

"Gentlemen, Mr. Morris, I'm sure there is a reasonable explanation for this," Ezra said, hoping to keep things from getting out of hand. He was sure that they had enough to bust Morris and his men at this point, but with luck there was still a chance this wouldn't turn into a shoot-out.

"Yeah, like maybe you all are pigs," Morris growled.

"ATF! FREEZE!"

Then again maybe not, Ezra groaned silently, diving for cover as the bullets started flying. He felt a searing pain in his side as he landed behind a pile of crates. Hands rolled him over onto his back and he found himself looking up at Chris.

"Correct me if I'm wrong here, Ezra, but didn't you say this was going to be a simple meet?" Chris asked, firing off another round at the gun runners they were supposed to be busting.

"Define simple," Ezra said, then hissed in pain when he jarred the gunshot wound in his side.

"They try to sell us guns, we say you're under arrest and they throw down their weapons and come along peaceably."

"If you knew you could do ten years in jail for selling guns would you come along peaceably?"

Chris looked over at him for a long moment.

Ezra shook his head. "Didn't think so."

Vin cursed under his breath, calmly picking off another of the gun runners trying to get the drop on Chris and Ezra's position. JD hadn't returned yet, but he couldn't leave his post until things were clear below. Buck was gonna kill him if JD had gone and gotten himself hurt. He wasn't even going to think about other possibilities.

After what seemed like forever Morris raised his hands in the air shouting his surrender. The three teams swarmed the area and the all clear was finally called.

Vin hurried into the hallway of the building calling JD's name. "JD? Where the hell are ya, kid? Buck's gonna kill me."

He turned at a faint sound from one of the rooms down the hall. Reaching the door of the room, he started to carefully inch his way inside. The sight of the clearly dead body had him lowering his gun and moving further into the room.

"Good way...to get...yourself killed," JD panted from behind him.

Vin whirled around to find him leaning against the wall behind the door, a gun in one hand and the other hand pressed into the bleeding wound in his thigh.

"Dammit, JD. What happened?" Vin asked hurrying to his side.

"Well," JD hissed in pain when Vin pressed on the wound, "I caught this guy sneaking around and when I asked him to hand over his gun he tried to shoot me instead."

"That weren't real friendly of him," he said as he looked around for something to use as a makeshift bandage. He was getting ready to pull off his vest so he could use his shirt when something in an open closet caught his eye. "Hold on, JD. I'll be right back."

"Don't worry. I'm not...goin' nowhere."

Opening the closet door fully, Vin found a sealed 12-pack of paper towel rolls. Just as he grabbed it Chris's voice came over his earpiece.

"Vin? Where the hell are you? Where's JD?"

"He's here, Chris. Need ta send up one of the medics."

"Are you two alright? Calm down, Buck. How bad is it?"

"I'm fine. Tell Bucklin to calm down. JD took a bullet in the leg. It ain't bad, but ya need ta get the medic up here."

"Will do. Keep pressure on it."

"I know. I know. Sheesh, you'd think I ain't ever done this before," Vin grumbled as he pulled out the pack of paper towels and opened it. Grabbing two rolls, he returned to JD. He handed him one and pulled the plastic wrapper off the second. "Medics'll be here soon. Gotta keep pressure on it, try and stop some a this blood from leakin' outta ya."

"Yeah, I know. I know. OW, dammit. That hurts," JD cried out, fingers digging into the roll of paper towels.

"Sorry, kid."

"S'okay, Vin. Ain't your fault," JD said through gritted teeth. Trying to take his mind off the burning fire in his leg, JD took a good look at what he held in his hands. "Where'd you get these?"

"Inna closet over there," Vin said with a jerk of his head towards the closet.

"Well, you picked the right thing for the job."

"Huh?"

JD held up the roll so that the logo was visible. Vin stared at him blankly. "It's Bounty, Vin. The quicker picker upper?"

Vin frowned at the roll like he still didn't get what JD was talking about.

"Ya know? It's Boun-ty, the quick-er pi-cker up-per," JD sang the jingle. A sudden thought occurred to him and he looked down at his leg with a frown. "It better not soak up too much of my blood. I kinda need to keep some for myself."

The look of consternation on the kid's face was too much for Vin and he started to chuckle.

"That's it. Laugh it up," JD grumbled with a goodnatured grin. "It's my blood that's being sucked up by an over-achieving paper towel."

"Well, it is the quicker picker upper," Vin reminded him with a wry grin.

"No. It's Boun-ty the quick-er pick-er up-per!"

That was how Chris, Buck, and the paramedics found them. Snickering and singing the jingle over and over again.

*******

"If you hum that idiotic jingle one more time, Mr. Dunne..."

Vin grinned as he stepped into the hospital room Ezra and JD were sharing. "Howdy, boys."

JD smiled, while Ezra glared.

"Hey, Vin. Whatcha got?" He asked nodding towards the brown paper bag in Vin's hand.

"Please tell me you have come to help me effect my emancipation from this...this place?" Ezra demanded.

"Nope. Sorry, Ez. Chris and the boys are gonna be here in a minute. You know they'd kill me if I helped you escape. I did get that book you'd wanted. The girl at the store was right helpful." Vin handed over the paperback.

"Thank you, Mr. Tanner. I'm sure this will go a long way in alleviating my boredom."

"Are you saying I'm boring?" JD demanded.

"No, Mr. Dunne. You and I simply do not share the same taste in television programs and I can only beat you at cards so many times before you have nothing else to lose."

"Uh-huh. You bring me anything, Vin? So's I can elevate my boredom?" JD glared at Ezra when he heard what sounded suspiciously like a snicker.

"Yep. Brought your Gameboy, some games and this."

Ezra groaned at the sight of what came out of the bag while JD laughed. It was a roll of Bounty paper towels.

"It's Boun-ty, the..."

"No!" Ezra shouted. "I refuse to listen to it one more time."

Vin snickered while JD stuck his tongue out at the Southerner. Putting the paper towels to the side, JD started going through the games Vin had brought. "Did you bring Golden Sun? I've been trying to beat the next level for what seems like forever."

"Which level is that?"

Ezra snuggled deeper into his pillow, wincing a little as the stitches in his side pulled, and opened his book, propping it up on his chest. He tuned out the sound of Vin and JD talking, trying to engross himself in his book. He started to hum.

Vin and JD looked up from the Gameboy when they heard the jingle being hummed by a distinctly Southern voice. They started snickering when Ezra groaned.

"Dear Lord, someone shoot me. Please. Please, shoot me now."

They couldn't help it. The Southerner's plaintive tone had them laughing in earnest.

Entering the hospital room, Chris and Buck looked from the two men laughing to the one trying to smother himself with his own pillow, then to each other.

"Think maybe we should have them all moved to the psychiatric wing, pard?" Buck asked, a grin twitching at his lips.

Chris sighed and shook his head. "I'm beginning to wonder. I really am."

~Fini~


End file.
